A "sticky" situation

Seabass wanted to know why things are sticky. Since I spent most of high school chemistry trying to figure out how to make my chair lean as far back as possible without falling over, I have no idea.

Apparently it has to do with electrical charges at the molecular level or "an asymmetrical distribution of charge of opposite sign". Dipoles to dipoles. Huh? Is this like molecular or atomic magnetism. Probably not, because none of the articles I read every mentioned molecular or atomic magnetism.

Then there is more chemical based bonds between an adhesive and substrate. These leads you down a quantum electrodynamics rabbit hole. Shit. That's not really helping either. I read a book on quantum physics. It was a hoot, but it felt like science fiction by the end. How am I supposed to divine from this why glue sticks more as it dries?

Okay - BASF's site has an okay answer. Things that are flush stick together well (like two wet microwavable food containers that get accidentally pushed together in the dish rack - I hate separating those things). Glue helps fill the gaps between both objects. I guess I get that. It's similar to suction. But why do flush things stick together? Jelly and peanut butter both fill the gaps in porous peanut butter, but jelly, which seems like it would fill those better, doesn't make bread stick as well peanut butter. There's the old frustration setting in. Unfortunately for me, I can smash, throw or scream at scientific laws. Fortunate for those laws, though.

As Forrest Gump once said "I'm not a smart man". Of course, he followed that statement with something profound - I got nothing though. How do I explain to a 4 year old why some things are sticky, and how "sticky" works.

I can't hardly wait for my friend who majored in materials engineering to give me a sarcastically complicated answer. Don't worry Shadrack - if my head goes all scanners on me and explodes, I'll make sure to post it on Youtube.

And I know the two things you are thinking you're thinking.

One: No, I'm not baked.

Two: Yes, the lame post title was consciously made in an effort to advance the cause of shitty blog post titles everywhere.